A Sad Day

It is with a heavy heart that I write today's post. We lost our 2 sweet girls this morning in a vicious dog attack. We had our baby fainting goats for only 2 weeks, but in that short time every member of our family grew to love them dearly. This morning Simon and Anabelle went out to give them their morning bottle and sometime after that our dog Scurvy and his friend Scruffy caught them and killed them. When we found them we were in shock and horrified. The damage was extensive, which means we are not only losing the girls, but we are not going to be able to keep Scurvy either. We are losing 3 pets. I don't want to go into the details, but we can not keep an animal that destroys and dismembers our other animals.
This is a hard post for me to write. It seems so senseless, and all of us are blaming ourselves and playing the "if only we had..." game. We have always been careful about keeping the dogs put up when the other animals are out, but Simon and Anabelle are just children and probably weren't paying attention this morning after feeding them their breakfast. Simon being 11 years old, is really blaming himself. I, being the mom, blame myself for letting the kids feed the goats without supervising. I didn't want to get out of bed, and so I gladly let them go feed the girls. If only I had gotten up... If only I would have heard something.... If only I would have checked on them... I know it doesn't do any good now, but I can't help but feel that I could have prevented this in some way. I know death is part of farm life, but that is part of farm life that none of us are used to.
I will write a eulogy of sorts in the next post and will reflect on the positive, but for now writing this has helped me get my feelings out. This blog has always been my "farm diary", so naturally when I am full of sad feelings I turn here to express them.
Thanks for listening.